Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Cita - Cita Saya Nak Jadi Polis!

 This post is written on 7 December 2009

It's The Truth.I Want To Be A Policewoman.
The sweet,pure Dream that I have when I 6 years old.
On that time I always think, If this want I want, I will get it when I'm become an adult.

Tapi Itu Dulu

Now..In the reality is hard to get want you been Dreaming of.
It's so hard that sometimes I think I want to quit everything that I do.

I don't know how suddenly I wanted so bad to be a professional accountant.
But this Dream is getting bigger and bigger after I finishing my intern as an audit trainee.

After I'm graduating, this is the thing that I look forward to and I got the job in audit service line and turned out to be the salary as an auditor is the cheapest one out here(Damn!!).
Chief clerk in government service have a higher salary then I am I tell ya.

But hey, I still accept it because this is my Dream.

Now,I'm currently pursuing my professional studies and I'm paying my fees in British Pound.
I don't apply any study loan and use my salary to paid my study expenses.

But hey, I still accept it because this is my Dream.

I gave up my pleasure and shopping time because I'm having tight budget.
I turned down all lepak2 invitation or karaoke time or midnight movie party from my fren, it's not because I don't want to but sincerely I don't have tendency to giving up all my paid money for some useless pleasure. I appreciate each cent that I earned and spent it wisely,very very wisely.In easy word I become kedekut-type of person.

But hey, I still accept it because this is my Dream.

But as time come by.
Many of my fren in audit line is move on to manufacturing or commercial company.
They get a better paid and really-really good benefit.
They can splurge their money without thinking much.
And I envy them so much!!

Additional to that..there are some serial unexpected events happen in my work life and their decision to move make my 'kepala otak' to also make a move.
I'm tired to have a little money for myself while some of my fren is having shout out in facebook that they already buy Guess pink bag or a DKNY watch, having a great lunch at Tony Roma's or just spending money at Benjamin Franklin Warehouse Sales!!

I Really Hate It.
Now I Think I Not Gonna Accept It Even It Is My Dream
For The First Time In My Life I Have The Biggest Meltdown Ever.
To Give Up On My Dream!

Life is hard rite...
But I think I will get through this mess..